Sunday, November 26, 2006

Sentences College Has Given Me, Part 1

The first in a series of sentences that make me sound like an overeducated snob:

"The excessive anthropomorphization of the evolutionary process in this documentary is extremely discomfiting."

Monday, November 20, 2006

You Stay Classy, SportsCenter

The Bills beat the Texans yesterday afternoon.

For that much-needed victory, JP Losman went 26/38 for 340 yards. On those 340 yards, Losman threw three glorious touchdown passes - two to Lee Evans, at 83 yards apiece, and another 15-yarder to Peerless Price in the last minute of the game.

Now, as much as I love the Bills, I am the first to admit that a Bills/Texans matchup is not exactly a clash of titans. In fact, I could be heard yesterday to comment that the only media coverage at the game would probably be provided by some random guy with a dirty baseball cap and a ham radio. I am further conscious of the fact that JP Losman is not exactly a phenom quarterback. The throwing yardage for this last game almost triples the Bills' weekly average (which, at 139 yards, is anemic).

However, Losman did a solid job this past week. His first two touchdown passes, and Evans' subsequent receptions, were beautiful and out of character for the Bills. And were it not Price's touchdown with 18 seconds left, we would not have won the game; Losman masterfully orchestrated the drive to get to the point where that pass was viable. Losman is not Peyton Manning. But this week he did what a quarterback needs to do, and we won the game because of it.

This is why it made me so angry when I turned on SportsCenter last night and heard the commentators, rather than praising Losman for a job well done, denigrating the Texans' defense. "This is JP Losman we're talking about here - what were the Texans thinking?"

Give credit where credit is due, SportsCenter. The Bills had a good day.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Dear Life,

It has come to my attention that, as I am a woman out of college, you would like it if I would start wearing dresses. Fine. However, please hold up your end of the bargain by either:

a. making dresses cost less than $100; or

b. getting me a job.

Thank you.