Wednesday, November 03, 2004

The Election in Away Messages

The stupid people have spoken (look! look! I'm still an elitist!).

And now the smart people are speaking (well, typing, which is why their grammar sucks):

Jeannie: i just don't understand. what the hell happened to this country?

Jason: hot or not?
hot: idiocy! pollution! pat robertson! greed!
not: intelligence! honesty! sanity! homos!

Dmitri: (1) My firm's prez worked with bush in his i-banking days, and yes, he is as dumb as a doorknob
(2) the populace is full of idiots, that is the only way to explain the outrageous number of votes cast for a man with an iq of a snail and the honor of a chechen terrorist.

Victor: bush is NOT my president

Mona: It's a sad day for America and the world.Congratulations, you idiots, you just elected a neo-con ignorant zealot who has nothing to lose this time.Moral of the story: never underestimate the stupidity of the American people. NEVER. hell, they will probably vote to amend the constitution and elect him for a third term because of the "war on terror" or some shit.

Chris (this is what we call BALANCED REPORTING, BILL O'REILLY): Concede BITCH!!! BUDDHA SAYS CONCEDE!!!

Kim: we need you ohio...depressed and scared. the worst part of being naively idealistic is how much it hurts when reality hits you in the face.

John M Miller (more balanced reporting): Yeah South! Yeah Midwest! Yeah Southwest! Yeah Northern Wilderness!

John Gilbert (this one is my FAVE-o-rite): to all you bigoted, "moral values"-toting, bible-thumping, "fag"-hating evangelical protestants who turned out so overwhelmingly for Bush, I hope you burn for all eternity in the hell that you are so sure exists. you are the plague on this country that will in all likelihood allow the arrogance of the current White House administration to persist. so as you bugle the moral values of unity and brotherhood while at the same time condemning or subtly denigrating entire groups of individuals, i hope you revel in your hypocrisy like pigs in the mud, for your time is coming to an end. i fucking hate you and your entire falwellian ilk.

Paul: ...I voted for Kerry, but if you express your disappointment about this election to me in more than five words, I'm absolutely not talking to you until this weekend. The people chose; stop bitching. It's my opinion that you're mostly mad b/c your team lost; it's like bitching because UNC beat Duke.

Marcy (I like this one too, even though it's not right): maybe when I come back we won't have a dunderhead for president anymore??????? *crosses fingers*

Dave: I hope you're happy, worthless redneck nazis. (yeeouch.)

*****

There is good news! (There is good news? Yes, there is, and it is that) Barack Obama CREAMED Alan Keyes (oh, Alan Keyes, you're funny in that YOU DON'T LIVE IN ILLINOIS, YOU F******* HYPOCRITE kind of way) and has moved to the top of my people-with-whom-to-engage-in-polygamy list. Barack Obama for President, 2012ish. More good news? Despite the fact that we lost (we lost. We really lost...sorry, I haven't come to terms with it yet), I'm really happy about the record voter turnout. No, I'm serious. Apparently I don't agree with the majority of people out there, but I have to respect their vote even as I'm working to change it.

They did their part, and now I've gotta do mine. I think this is the start of a new, politically active Allison.

Also, this isn't really good news, but it was really funny to watch CNN all night last night, mostly because Larry King got to show on national television (AGAIN) what an idiot he is. Wolf Blitzer helped. If you watched the reactions of Carlos Watson (also on the list) and Jeff Greenfield (he's Grandpa's age, so not on the list, ick) every time either Wolf or Larry opened their mouths, you could see their absolute disgust with the condition of news reporting in this country. It was a cross between a snide smirk and shock.

Larry King: So, Jeff, they have that stadium thing to think about in New York.
Jeff Greenfield (taken aback for a minute): Actually, Larry, that's not even on the ballot this year. And even if it were, I think it's safe to say that it wouldn't have a measurable effect on the results of the MOST POLEMICIZED PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION IN YEARS (emphasis mine).
Larry King: Oh.

Barack Obama for benevolent dictator!

Extend my student visa for as long as possible! (just kidding. New, proactive Allison does not run from the dummy in the White House.)

***edit***

I just accessed my Hotmail, and it was in French. Here's why:

bludevlagain: "Bush's second-term plans to jettison liberals over to 'those snail-eating Frenchies' were announced to all those affected today through their Hotmail accounts. Those who do not subscribe to Hotmail were instead thrown into cargo holds of oil tankers and shipped to Iraq."
DeirdreRH: haha
DeirdreRH: once we get there, I'm sure we'll show him up, too
bludevlagain: "the outrage that might normally be expressed over Bush's decision to deport hundreds of law-abiding American citizens was addressed by the White House: 'We found a copy of the Anarchist's Cookbook in the house of every one of these people. Or maybe it was The American Cookbook. Or Martha Stewart Living. Or something.'"
DeirdreRH: is this you writing?
bludevlagain: yes
bludevlagain: it's amazing what I can rig up out of absolute depression and desperation
DeirdreRH: good stuff :-) blog it!

Done.

2 Comments:

Blogger Coral Clarke said...

See my comment on the previous post (re:
Bush winning).

11/03/2004 12:01 PM  
Blogger Rita Xavier said...

See my comments, also. I am not a happy camper today.

11/03/2004 6:22 PM  

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