HAPPY POTTER!

HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER!

VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT VOLDEMORT!

I mean, ahem.

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(Sort of) spoiler-free synopsis:

1. Cedric Diggory, while still very pretty, looks markedly different than the impression I got from the trailer. His nose is small. Considering that he's a pretty big kid, the nose was odd.

2. Emma Watson and Rupert Grint each have only one facial expression (respectively: exasperated, confused). I predict this will get old eventually.

3. Hermione looks stunning in her dress robes.

4. Krum is very good and just meatheaded enough.

5. There is an ABSOLUTE ABSENCE OF QUIDDITCH. NO WORLD CUP IS SHOWN. WHAT THE HELL.

6. Tiny Voldemort looks like a Muppet. Big Voldemort, on the other hand, is pretty terrifying. The reconstitution scene fights its own personal battle between cheesy and OH GOD, HIS ROBES ARE MADE OUT OF THE NIGHT.

7. The people trapped underwater? They're so dolls. It's not even forgiveable. So cheesy. So corny. So BAD. If they could afford to draw in MERPEOPLE, why can't they make the PEOPLE look human?

8. The labyrinth scene is not anything like anything even remotely resembling the book.

9. Moody is great. He's easy to like, just weird enough, protective of Harry, etc. However, not ONCE is the phrase "CONSTANT VIGILANCE!" to be found.

10. Severe lack of Severus.

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Done now.