Welcome to the Nexus of Unfulfilled Expectations
So you are probably wondering where I am, seeing as how there have been DNA test results and indictments and protests and campus-wide temperature taking and blaaaaaah. Please trust me when I say that I do have opinions on all of these things - opinions that are probably unpopular at best around this here campus and could be viewed as traitorous at worst.
However, a certain familially-inherited perversity is pushing me to not write about things when they are expected (and I can't find the specific post I'm looking for - you'll just have to trust me that he said it).
Also, there's the matter of the term paper, currently 35 pages long, that I am supposed to be writing. I was deadlocked on it for weeks until yesterday, when I had an epiphany during my yoga class* (we're talking heavenly chorus, descending angels, Monty Python foot-type revelation here) and now see spread in front of me a year's worth of work to do in two weeks. There is no practical way that I will be able to accomplish this, and yet I am going to try. So, in all likelihood, you will not be hearing from me in any substantive way for at least those two weeks.
*Why is it that, immediately upon hearing my yoga teacher tell me to stop thinking about the future and what I have to get done that day, I start thinking about the future and what I have to get done that day? Stupid perversity.
**HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JEANNIE! I love you more than a fat kid loves cake. With frosting. And those tiny candy figurines that go on top.